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« on: November 01, 2009, 08:35:47 pm »
Hi everybody! (CHORUS: Hi, Dr. Druzhina!) I was just accepted into RIA. I like it here. I have already been propositioned for sexual favors by one member, and will be sorely disappointed if that's the last one. I once auditioned to be on "So You Think You Can Dance?"; sadly, I was not cast on the show:
[embed src=\"http://www.youtube.com/v/ePNWCniwgfo&rel=1\" type=\"application/x-shockwave-flash\" wmode=\"transparent\" width=\"425\" height=\"355\"][/embed]
I like to eat grass because it cuts my tongue so good. My shoes are made entirely of duct tape. As a child, I wore glasses frames with no lenses to make me look smarter, which resulted in a 374% increase in the number of swirlies I received. Due to a freak accident with a blowtorch and a sander, I have no navel. I have unhealthy fantasies about Andrew Lloyd Weber. I can do 1500 chinups but only 10 squat-thrusts, making me very top-heavy and causing a lot of sinking problems when I try to go swimming.
On a more somber note, I would like to register a complaint that I did not, in fact, receive any ice cream.