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Author Topic: Wow, at this inspirational email my grandma sent me  (Read 929 times)

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Offline Kenneth Kenstar

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Wow, at this inspirational email my grandma sent me
« on: November 11, 2011, 12:25:47 pm »
Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known!"



At this moment, a brave Navy SEAL who had served 15 tours of duty stood up and held up a rock.




"How old is this rock?"


The professor smirked arrogantly and replied "4.6 billion years. Idiot"




"Wrong. It's 5,000 years old. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real... then it should be an animal now"



The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk. He stormed out of the room.



The students applauded and all registered Republican that day. An eagle flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day.



Semper Fi.
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Offline Mogar

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Re: Wow, at this inspirational email my grandma sent me
« Reply #1 on: November 11, 2011, 03:19:49 pm »
whatthefuckamireading.jpeg
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Offline Pterrydactyl

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Re: Wow, at this inspirational email my grandma sent me
« Reply #2 on: November 11, 2011, 03:21:17 pm »
This... is complete bullshit...

It's a variation of a story about how a professor was trying to prove that god didn't exist during his lecture.

he said "If god exists, let him prove it by knocking my off my podium".

A Marine veteran then walked up to him and knocked him over, saying "God was busy, so he sent me".

That is actually a true story.  Laat i heard, The Marine was suspended, and there was a petition or something to get him back into the school.
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Offline Arsenal 10

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Re: Wow, at this inspirational email my grandma sent me
« Reply #3 on: November 11, 2011, 03:43:12 pm »
Quote from: Pterrydactyl on November 11, 2011, 03:21:17 pm
It's a variation of a story about how a professor was trying to prove that god didn't exist during his lecture.

he said "If god exists, let him prove it by knocking my off my podium".

A Marine veteran then walked up to him and knocked him over, saying "God was busy, so he sent me".

That is actually a true story.  Laat i heard, The Marine was suspended, and there was a petition or something to get him back into the school.
That is pretty funny though. I would sign that petition. Sounds like the lecturer deserved it anyway.
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Offline Fake from State Jarm

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Re: Wow, at this inspirational email my grandma sent me
« Reply #4 on: November 11, 2011, 06:48:51 pm »
I like kenny's version better

Quote from: Abe Simpson on November 11, 2011, 12:25:47 pm
The professor smirked arrogantly and replied "4.6 billion years. Idiot"

 :kenny:
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Offline Jenne

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Re: Wow, at this inspirational email my grandma sent me
« Reply #5 on: November 11, 2011, 08:11:20 pm »
All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
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Offline Leo

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Re: Wow, at this inspirational email my grandma sent me
« Reply #6 on: November 11, 2011, 10:11:49 pm »
Quote from: Jenne on November 11, 2011, 08:11:20 pm
All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
Well, I didn't get your hand up, but it appears that I certainly raised your penis.
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Offline Buck Turgidson

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Re: Wow, at this inspirational email my grandma sent me
« Reply #7 on: November 15, 2011, 01:45:40 am »
Quote from: Abe Simpson on November 11, 2011, 12:25:47 pm

"Wrong. It's 5,000 years old. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real... then it should be an animal now"


It is a good point - why haven't all rocks turned into animals and started existential arguments by now?

Oh look, now my penis is up too.
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