But I must say, it is the epitome of bad memories now. It makes me sad just reading it. Don't yell at me for posting it, people involved...I'm doing this for old times sake.
*Leo is walking through a parking lot at night*
Leo: Man, those three dozen chili dogs are gonna be barkin' tonight!
*Rustle Rustle*
Leo: What was that? Hmm, must have been my imagination. Silly imagination, you are as overactive as zblewski.
*Leo keeps walking*
*Shadow passes over Leo's head*
Leo: Okay, now I know I saw something! Who's there? Hello?
*Multiple shadows pass over Leo's head*
Leo: Okay, this is ridiculous. It's a clear night, and I was looking up that whole time.
*Shadow bursts out of Leo's chest*
Shadow: Hah, your ribs are no match for my powers of darkness!
Leo: Can't.....get in....one last wit-..witty remark......Argh.
*Leo falls over dead*
*Flask walks up to Shadow standing over Leo's body*
Flask: Good work. I'll finish up here, you can head home.
Shadow: As you wish.
*Shadow disappears into the shadow of a dumpster nearby*
Flask: Leo, Leo, Leo....you shouldn't have messed with the girl.
*Flask drops lit match onto Leo's corpse*
*Leo's corpse bursts into flames*
*Flask turns and shoots grappling hook onto brick building, zipping away to the sky*
*Agent Skywalker and Delta are sitting at a table in a restaurant*
Skywalker: So then I told the guy “Hey, look, this is my purse, and it is not for sale.”
Delta: Hah, I bet he felt a little weird after that!
Skywalker: I’m sure he did!
*The two laugh for a minute or two*
Skywalker: Okay, I have to go. I’m meeting Zeep at the movies.
Delta: Well, I don’t want to keep you. Say hi to him for me.
*Flask walks in with Vector a step behind*
Skywalker: Oh, hi Flask! Sorry I can’t talk, gotta run.
*Skywalker bolts out the door*
*Flask walks over to where Delta is still sitting*
Delta: Is it done?
Flask: Of course.
Delta: Good. She is precious to the alliance. If anything were to happen to her…we would be ruined.
Flask: I know all of that. But will Zeep be a problem?
Delta: What?
Flask: I said will Zeep be a problem?
Delta: Speak up.
Flask: Wi-WILL ZEEP BE A PROBLEM?
Delta: NO!
Flask: OKAY THEN.
Vector: CAN I GRAB A ROOT BEER?
Flask: SURE! BUT MAKE IT QUICK!
Shamed: So, did you kill her yet?
Crazy: Why the hell would I kill her?
Shamed: I just assumed you would want to kill her. You are a crazy israelie.
Crazy: I’m no murderer.
Shamed: That’s fine with me. I was trying to give you some liberty here. But I guess you can just keep her from handing over the information to Delta and the others.
Crazy: Right, just silence her.
Shamed: coughWith a Silencercough.
Crazy: What?
Shamed: What?
*Crazy stares at Shamed for a moment*
*Shamed shuffles uncomfortably*
Crazy: I may be an RIA member, but if Skywalker releases those USN secrets she learned in her time there, it would be catastrophic to CN as a whole.
Shamed: Exactly. But Delta knows we’re trying to remove her from the picture. That’s why he’s been fending off our attacks and killing your team of elites. But we know that he knows, and I’m guessing he probably knows that we know.
Crazy: But do you think he knows what exactly we’re trying to stop by getting her back?
Shamed: How could he? All he knows is that we want her back, and for a good reason.
Crazy: So who do we send?
Shamed: I’m sure you’ll find someone soon.
Crazy: I….I really don’t have anyone.
Shamed: Well then get someone. I can’t send a USN member; it’ll be seen as an act of war.
Crazy: Fine.
Shamed: It better be fine. In fact, if it wasn’t so fine, I’d be beating you right now. Go.
*Flask walks into a large chamber with rows and rows of monitors showing different color blips moving in various directions*
*The men monitoring the monitors turn and watch Flask as he walks by*
Flask: Carry on.
Kamuimagami: What do I carry?
Flask: Just keep doing what you were doing before.
Kamuimagami: Oh. Okay.
*Flask opens a door and steps into a small office*
*Delta is sitting at a desk listening to music*
Flask: I’m going to send a man to escort Skywalker to the docks. There will be a ship waiting there to take her to the Island Headquarters.
Delta: We have an island headquarters?
Flask: Yeah.
Delta: When did we get that?
Flask: A couple months ago.
Delta: Really?
Flask: No, not really.
Delta: Who’s in charge there?
Flask: Shyox and Azural.
Delta: I thought they left.
Flask: They did leave….to the Island Headquarters.
Delta: Oh. Well, then that’s all good.
Flask: Good.
Delta: Good.
*A small vessel is making its way through the waves*
Skywalker: You don’t have to stand there.
Ananegg: I kind of do. It’s my job.
Skywalker: But you’re making me nervous, standing so close behind.
Ananegg: I guess I could back off a little. But I just don’t want any, you know…pirates or whatever to get you.
Skywalker: I’m sure you’ll be able to save me from more than a few inches away.
*Ananegg takes a few steps back*
*A sudden explosion rocks the boat, rocks the boat baby*
Skywalker: What was that?!
Ananegg: I don’t know! An explosion maybe?
*Skywalker glares at ananegg*
Ananegg: I would check it out, but my orders were solely to protect you from harm.
*A whistling noise is heard, and Lakai runs at incredible speeds toward Ananegg, knocking him over*
Skywalker: No!
*Ananegg is flung overboard*
*Lakai rushes over and picks up Skywalker, before racing back towards the front of the ship*
*Lakai runs down a plank and onto another even small boat*
*The boat starts up and speeds away*
Skywalker: Why are you doing this?
Lakai: We couldn’t let you give the RIA any of the USN’s plans.
Skywalker: What makes you think I would ever reveal anything to them?
Lakai: …….Well, we couldn’t take that chance. That’s all. Please don’t get me fired.
*Vector walks briskly to Flask, who is staring out of the window in a hallway*
Vector: Were you alerted? The boat transporting Skywalker was intercepted halfway there. They kidnapped her. I bet it was Shamed.
Flask: Of course it was Shamed. It’s always Shamed. When the fark has it NOT been Shamed?
Vector: That one time…I don’t know.
Flask: Exactly. He’s always kidnapping people and making threats. But he never actually does any direct work. He’s basically a female.
Vector: No way!
Flask: No way what?
Vector: Are you sure he’s female?
Flask: He’s not.
Vector: But…whatever. I’m going to go stab a pillow.
Flask: Go ahead.
*Vector walks away*
Flask: Where could she be…?
Divine: Up ze butt and around ze corner!
Flask: Where did you come from?
Divine: Lunch.
Flask: Do you want to go on a mission?
Divine: Didn’t you fire me?
Flask: Okay. You’re hired again.
Divine: Cool. What’s the mission?
Flask: You know what, scratch that, you’re fired again. You can leave now.
Divine: I don’t think I like you.
*Rain is pouring down upon a small building*
*Three figures are squatting in the bushes a few yards away*
Vector: So we know she’s in there?
Flask: Of course. The sign we passed a few minutes ago said that this is their secret instillation.
Damen: Why don’t we have guns?
Flask: We don’t need guns. We have the power of intelligence.
Vector: I would rather have a gun.
Damen: Me too.
Flask: The budget doesn’t allow for crap like that. Now just follow me.
*Flask stands up and darts to the side of the building, as Vector and Damen follow*
Flask: Okay, there’s a guard over there by the door. We need to take him out and get inside.
Damen: We still don’t have any guns.
Flask: Guns are evil! Besides, we have these sticks.
Vector: They aren’t even sharp sticks.
Flask: It’s all about the technique. Just hit him in the head.
*Flask races forward*
Marine91: Whoa, who are you?
Flask: I’m the juggern-….Flask. I’m Flask.
Marine91: Well, you’re not allowed in. You’re from the RIA right?
Flask: Possibly
*Flask brings the stick down upon Marine’s head, and Marine91 crumples under the blow*
Vector: I still think we should have guns….
*Amazonian Beasts rushes into a control room*
Amazonian Beasts: Flask…and his men. They’re coming! We tried to stop them, but…they cut a swathe through our numbers with their sticks!
Shamed: Sticks?
Amazonian Beasts: Yes! Sticks!
Crazy: That definitely sounds like Flask…
Shamed: Okay, when they get here, we’ll be ready.
*Flask, Vector, and Damen burst through the door*
Flask: Where’s the girl?
Shamed: I’m not quite ready.
Crazy: Could you come back another time?
Damen: Crazy? You’re in on this? Traitor!
Vector: Traitor!
Flask: MURDERER!
Crazy: What? I didn’t murder anyone!
Flask: There’s a fine line between murder and kidnapping!
Shamed: Not really.
Flask: Nobody asked you, female!
Amazonian Beasts: She’s over there.
*Amazonian Beasts points to a chair where Skywalker is waving*
Skywalker: Hi. Can we go now?
Shamed: NO! If we let you go, you’ll tell them all about our Inverted Land Plan!
Vector: O.o
Flask: How does that even work?
*The group is sitting at a table*
Shamed: So you see, it would turn CN upside down, or inside out I guess would be more appropriate. Riots would start. People would die. Nukes would drop. Polar Bears would be wiped out.
Flask: I think I understand.
Damen: That part about the doorbells was messed up.
Crazy: Anyways, that’s why I was helping to get Skywalker back. She could have revealed this to all of you.
Vector: But you just told us anyway.
Shamed: I’m assuming you three won’t tell anyone.
Flask: You have our word.
*Flask leads Damen, Vector, and Skywalker out of the room*
Crazy: So, I better be getting back.
Shamed: You know what to do?
Crazy: Of course. I’m gonna need to borrow that megaphone though.
Shamed: Sure. All you need to do is release the plan to the public of CN. Then, chaos shall reign.
Crazy: I already told you I got it. What if Flask left some kind of tiny transmitting device somewhere?
Shamed: He didn’t. The RIA doesn’t have that kind of technology.
Crazy: Yes they do. They’re just two lazy to plug stuff in.
Shamed: Oh, well…..just go and do it.
Crazy: I’m going.
Shamed: Good.
Crazy: Shut up.
Shamed: No you.
*The group is sitting in the RIA Social Quarters*
Flask: Well, I’m glad that’s settled.
Skywalker: Thanks for rescuing me.
Ananegg: All in a day’s work.
*The group looks at Ananegg*
Damen: Aren’t you dead?
Ananegg: Super picked me up in a dinghy two days after the, uh, “mishap”.
Damen: I see…
*The door flies open, and Moth steps in*
Moth: Good evening.
Vector: Yo.
Moth: We have a Code Reddish-Purple.
Flask: Oh god. Crazy has gone berserk and revealed the USN’s secrets?
Moth: Exactly. I’m sure you can handle it. I need to go nap. I’m very important, you know.
CEH: I love you Moth.
Moth: Yeah baby I know it.
Flask: Okay guys, let’s stop the madman and save the day!
Damen: Huzzah and such!
Vector: Do we get some sharp sticks for this mission?
*Flask punches Vector in the stomach*
*Vector keels over*
Flask: He looks sick. We better leave him here. Ananegg, c’mon.
Vector: Guh…
*Flask and the gang arrive at the capital*
*Chaos is totally reigning*
Flask: There he is!
*Crazy is standing atop a large statue, shouting things through a megaphone*
*Damen throws his stick*
*The stick beans crazy in the head, knocking him to the ground*
Flask: I didn’t tell you to do that. I was just going to talk to him.
Damen: He was endangering civilians!
Flask: He is yelling through a voice amplifying device and everybody is just running around screaming.
Ananegg: It’s very hectic, I agree.
*Lakai comes out of nowhere and knocks Ananegg down*
Lakai: You’ve bitten the dust twice now. I am far superior in the leet skillz.
Flask: EL.
*EnragedLobster drops from the sky and cuts Lakai in half with his pincers*
EnragedLobster: EAT SHEEP! EAT SHEEP!
Flask: Now that’s what I call a team effort! Good job, Ananegg! You really did that bait thing well!
*Ananegg is unconscious*
Damen: Um…
Flask: Leave him. Let’s get crazy and go!
*EnragedLobster picks up crazy’s limp body*
Shamed: It’s too late, Flask! CN is doomed! And I shall rise from my super safe bunker, and take control of the ruins!
TO BE CONTINUED…
Flask: Why would you want to own ruins?
Shamed: I’m using ruins as a general term for what CN will be like after all of this apocalyptic mayhem.
Damen: Hey, what’s that?
*A glowing orb appears in the sky*
Flask: When did the moon get so sma-
*Flask and Shamed disappear*
Damen: Holy sheep!
EnragedLobster: EAT SHEEP! EAT SHEEP!
*Flask and Shamed are floating in space*
Shamed: Hey… I can see all of Planet Bob up here.
Flask: But why can we breathe?
*There’s a brilliant flash of light and a huge black light figure appears*
Admin: Okay, you guys need to cut the s***. I’m serious. I’m tired of all this f****** business about taking over the world.
Flask: That’s Shamed.
Shamed: ….
Admin: Whatever, I just need both of you to calm the f*** down and go live quiet lives and die alone.
Shamed: Why do we have t-
Admin: SHUT UP! Just piss off, you soaking piles of idiocracy!
Shamed: ….
Crunka: Hey guys.
Flask: What are you doing here?
Crunka: Where do you think I go all the time?
*Flask and Shamed rocket back to Bob’s surface*
*Shyox, Delta, and Azural are already there*
Delta: What happened?
Flask: We, uh….admin yelled at us.
Shamed: He made me poop a little.
Azural: Well, Shamed, are you sane again?
Shamed: I hope so.
Shyox: You better be. You can just go back to the USN now.
*Shamed skulks away*
Ananegg: Ugh….what happened? Where am I?
Flask: Your name is Gorgon Jones. You live in a cardboard box on Adams Street. You slipped and fell and broke your crown. Go home.
*Ananegg stumbles off*
*zombie2000 walks up in a gas mask*
zombie: Just so you guys know, I’ve released an odorless toxin into this area. You all have a couple days to live.
Damen: What the hell? Why?!
zombie: Because none of you have ever given me the respect I deserve.
Flask: We just got done dealing with another large scale problem. Can we get some sleep before we kick your….shins?
zombie: Sure, if you want to waste a big portion of the rest of your life.
Shyox: Dude….not cool. Not. Cool.
zombie: I am too cool! I hid the antidote where you’ll never find it! I WINNAR!
EnragedLobster: EAT SHEEP! EAT SHEEP!
Flask: Damn….well, c’mon team. We better go look for that antidote.
Admin: Argh. That always happens. I put on a big show and fix everything, and then cheeseaholic walks in and completely screws everything up.
Crunka: Really? That always happens?
Admin: Always. Even on Sundays, and that’s just a *****.
Crunka: I bet. So what’re going to do about it now?
Admin: Well, I have to reset everything.